When is it Time to Pursue Marriage Counseling, Sex Therapy or Couples Therapy?
Science is on the side of this fact: Ongoing distress in one's relationship is harmful to each partner's physical and mental health (Robles et al., 2014). We know this; however, despite this awareness, marriage counseling and couples therapy is a treatment intervention that is commonly feared.
“Are things really that bad?”
“If we go to couples therapy, that makes our problems too real”.
“We can just fix this ourselves”.
Growing emotional distance, oftentimes caused by chronic stress in the relationship. This can leave us feeling like we are stranded in the middle of the ocean. Barely staying afloat—desperate for connection, security, and safety. The missing piece of commitment and trust perpetuates toxic interactions that push partners farther away from each other. Rather than building a path to find their way back to each other.
If this describes your relationship, it might be time to seek out couples therapy in New York, New Jersey, and Connecticut.
Are you asking yourself,
“How Are We Doing?”
Take this quiz to evaluate the nature of your relationship and determine the next steps.
Read through the 11 items on this quiz and note what statements do or do not apply to your relationship. This will help illuminate and evaluate the level of distress that may exist in your relationship.
You might benefit from Marriage Counseling or Couples Therapy if:
A Proven Philosophy
for Couples Therapy
At Repose, we draw our approach to marriage counseling and couples therapy from attachment theory.
Our attachment styles in adulthood reflect the hand we were dealt in our childhood. In fact, unmet expectations and disappointments in relationships cause many of us tremendous suffering.
We are wired for connection and long for intimacy, but heartbreak, abandonment, betrayal, poor communication, and the feeling of isolation are the pain points that cause some of our most hurtful wounds. The fundamental premise of attachment theory is that we learn how to be a partner(s), husband, wife, or parent, from our early-life relationships with our primary caregivers.
The way our parental attachment figures attended to our physical and emotional needs shaped the attachment style we grew to form as adults.
Our Gold Standard Approach to Marriage Counseling, Sex Therapy and Couples Therapy
Our couples therapists follow the evidence-based best practices of gold-standard marriage counseling and couples therapy pioneers such as John Gottman, Sue Johnson, and draws influence from Esther Perel and Tara Brach
EMDR for Relationships
You’re a couple in distress. You’ve tried everything. You feel defeated. Rather than throwing in the towel why not try a different approach? A more direct approach that directly targets your brain. Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing or EMDR can help you to quickly target unresolved relationship issues.
EMDR can help you move past the experience of betrayal. By reducing the intensity of negative emotions around a negative event, you can allow yourself the opportunity to move. EMDR uses rapid eye movements to engage bilateral stimulation and enable healthy processing of these “stuck” emotions and memories. EMDR also helps you target past trauma, that may be unconsciously influencing how you interact with your partner. EMDR helps to locate these buried wounds and process them. By tending to these past wounds, EMDR is able to help you lessen the feelings and emotions associated with these memories. Interested to know more about EMDR? Click here. Interesting in learning about Repose’s couple’s offerings? Click here.
How We Help
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Busting Common Myths
About Marriage Counseling and Couples Therapy
Inclusivity
We work with heterosexual, queer, non-monogamy, polyamorous, gender-nonconforming, and trans relationships. We also work with mixed-race and mixed-nationality relationships, as well as second-marriages, blended families, adoption, and long-term relationships not defined by marriage.
Our couples therapy in New York, New Jersey, and Connecticut will also equip couples with the ability to engage in conflict resolution, by making effective repairs during the conflict, engaging in de-escalation, practicing psychological self-soothing, and learning to compromise with one another.
Relationship Checkup Derichs, J. (2020) / Retrieved September 22, (2020)
Marital quality and health: A meta-analytic review. Robles, T., Slatcher, R., Trombello, J., & McGinn, M. / Psychological Bulletin, 140, 140-187, (2014)
After the first call,
What’s next?
Schedule a consultation
We make it simple to find support. Conveniently self-schedule a 15-minute consultation at Repose Therapy so we can understand your reasons for seeking therapy and gather information in the most efficient and sensitive way possible.
Chat with our
Client Concierge
During your consultation, your concierge will listen to you, ask questions, and discuss your options. Based on the information gathered, they will be able to recommend which of our couple’s therapists would be well-suited to meet your unique needs.
Meet with your
Repose Couple’s Therapist
It’s time to begin the collaborative work of marriage counseling and couple’s therapy with someone who supports and understands you. After the initial session with your therapist, your concierge will follow up to ensure you had a positive experience.
Relationship Books Selection
A curated list of our therapists’ most recommended resources
Subscribe to get a free meditation for trauma
Learn an evidence-based technique used in EMDR trauma therapy called, “Safe Place”. While being gently led through a simple visualization exercise, we invite you to create an internal emotional sanctuary. This safe, calm place is where you may go to rest, recover from stress, or manage overwhelming emotions.
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