Cuffing or Coping?
A couple lies side by side on a neatly made bed, facing each other and holding hands. The scene is calm and intimate, with soft natural light and a modern, minimal bedroom in the background.
Seasonal love, emotional patterns, and the comfort we chase.
As the weather cools, our craving for connection often grows stronger. The nights get longer, the world slows down, and suddenly we’re more aware of our need for closeness. But what happens when the warmth we seek becomes less about genuine connection — and more about comfort?
This is where cuffing season comes in.
When Comfort Feels Like Connection
Cuffing season isn’t inherently bad. It’s human to want touch, intimacy, and someone to share the quiet months with. But when connection becomes a form of self-soothing, we can easily slip into patterns that feel safe in the moment — and confusing later on.
We might chase the feeling of being wanted rather than the experience of being truly seen. Or mistake emotional intensity for love, when it’s really just our nervous system responding to familiar chaos.
Ask yourself:
Am I drawn to this person, or the feeling of being wanted?
Do I feel grounded or anxious when we’re apart?
Is this love — or emotional distraction?
Attachment, Safety & the Stories We Tell
Our attachment styles often shape how we love — and who we love. For some, closeness feels comforting; for others, it feels overwhelming. When we don’t recognize these patterns, we can find ourselves stuck in cycles that mirror old emotional wounds.
True connection isn’t about intensity. It’s about safety — the kind of love that feels calm, not chaotic.
Ending Kindly — Without Guilt or Shame
Whether it’s a relationship that ran its course or a cuffing-season connection that no longer feels aligned, endings don’t have to be harsh. They can be gentle, honest, and rooted in self-awareness.
Ending kindly means acknowledging what served you — and what no longer does. It’s not rejection; it’s release.
Love That Feels Like Calm
It’s okay to crave connection. Just make sure it’s built on truth — not temporary comfort. The more we understand our attachment patterns, the easier it becomes to choose relationships that feel nourishing, not numbing.
Ready to move from temporary comfort to intentional connection?
Our couples therapists help partners deepen trust, navigate tough conversations, and create a relationship that feels calm instead of chaotic.
Learn more about couples therapy at Repose.